Pet Memorial Day

[CairnTerrierMom]

Client Counselor Encourages Celebration of Pet Memorial Day
Author: Amanda Barth

Sunday, September 10, is National Pet Memorial Day, and experts at the University of Illinois College of Veterinary Medicine, Urbana, Ill., hope animal owners and others will take time to recognize that pets, living or past, are worth cherishing.

According to Cheryl Weber, the client counselor specialist at the College's Veterinary Teaching Hospital, National Pet Memorial Day can be a good time for both pet owners and "non-animal people" to recognize that everyone experiences loss and that it's healthy for pet lovers to acknowledge their love for their pets and the grief they feel when a pet dies.

A few of the ways Weber recommends for celebrating National Pet Memorial Day are:

Sharing photos and stories of former pets and thinking about the joy they've brought us

Visiting a pet's burial site, holding a remembrance ceremony, or creating a living memorial by planting a tree, bush, or flowerbed

Doing something to benefit animals, such as volunteering for a rescue group, pet-sitting for a friend, or donating to an animal-related charity

Weber says even those who are not animal lovers can show support for a friend or co-worker who loses a pet by simply giving a sympathy card or saying "I'm sorry you lost your cat."

Background and Resources

Cheryl Weber is a licensed social worker with experience in human hospice care who works as the client counselor specialist at the Veterinary Teaching Hospital at the University of Illinois College of Veterinary Medicine. She assists hospital veterinarians by providing emotional support for pet owners, teaches a class about bereavement issues, and advises the C.A.R.E. Helpline.

The C.A.R.E. Helpline is a confidential telephone service for people grieving the actual or anticipated loss of their companion animal. It is run by students at the University of Illinois College of Veterinary Medicine. The number is 244-CARE locally or 877/394-CARE toll free. The Web site (http://www.cvm.uiuc.edu/CARE/) has information on the grieving process.

The College of Veterinary Medicine at the University of Illinois is one of only 28 veterinary schools in the United States and the only one in Illinois. It offers Doctor of Veterinary Medicine, master's, and PhD degrees, conducts research on a broad range of biomedical and agricultural topics; and provides service to the public through numerous educational outlets as well as through its Veterinary Teaching Hospital and Veterinary Diagnostic Laboratory.

The Companion Animal Memorial Fund was established at the College of Veterinary Medicine to help veterinarians express compassion by memorializing clients' pets and at the same time contributing to research that benefits other companion animals.

National Pet Memorial Day, sponsored by the International Association of Pet Cemeteries, occurs each year on the second Sunday in September.

An archive of Pet Columns from the University of Illinois College of Veterinary Medicine is available online at www.cvm.uiuc.edu/petcolumns/.
Requests for reprints of this article may be directed to Mandy Barth, mandyb@uiuc.edu.

Veterinary Extension/Office of Public Engagement University of Illinois College of Veterinary Medicine
217/333-2907

[LagottoLady]

After reading this, I was thinking...maybe it's a nice idea to share the ways we remember our beloved pets :) Because there is no one way to do it, it might become a nice and diverse "collection" of remembrances rituals, also it maybe of some benefit to others.

I will start and see if others will/can share as well :)

I had all my pets cremated. And since I don't like the official ash bowls, I bought a sugarbowl for each and everyone of them...I always had smaller breeds :) I handpicked them, matching their personalities.

On a table, I have a glass tray with all the sugarbowls on them :) (some people are scared to ask for sugar in their tea or coffee :D ) Next to every bowl there is a picture of the dog and it's fav toy...that I never washed. The toys are still dirty and look very used :)

Every morning I light 3 little candles, one for each dog..and say "Good morning sweeteis" :) When I have to leave the house, I will blow out the candles and tell them I will be right back. And at night, when I no longer have to leave the house, I will light the candles again...tell them I am back. Before I go to sleep, I blow out the candles wishing each of my dogs sweet dreams :)

To some this may sound very ridiculous but I never could let them go... I want them with me, where they belong :) I feel comfortable when I can wish them sweet dreams still..every night :)

And as a final tribute, I have always financially adopted a pet somewhere else...in a place where they have no chance. Through this, I can at least provide decent meals and basic healthcare for one dog... well, 3 now :) And I make the donations in the name of my dogs...so through their life...and also in their death, they are still meaningfull and making the world a better place to one other living creature :) Tim, my first dog, is providing for a dog in Romania. Pascha, is providing for a dog in Spain. And Boncuk, my precious beloved Boncuk is providing for a dog in Turkey of course :)

So this is the way I remember and honour my dogs...their life but also still in death. And to me, this is the way that makes me feel good. And that is what it is about, to grief, remember and honor in ways that we personally feel good about. Not what others may think of us ;)

To all pets...the ones we knew, loved and lost..and the ones that never belonged and never knew love...let's give them all a minute of our time and think about them for a moment :)

Saskia and Sogno :)

[labblab]

Mary, thank you so much for telling us about this special day of remembrance! And Saskia, I was so touched to read about the ways that you honor your spirit babies. It has really made me think about ways that I could also contribute in Barkis' name -- what a wonderful living memorial :o.

If you've read my threads in the "Healing" sub-forum, you may already know that my husband and I also chose to have Barkis cremated. For over a year, it felt really important to keep his ashes with us in a container on our family room mantel. That way, it seemed like he was still with us where we played and hugged in the mornings and the evenings, just like always. But starting last spring, we began to spread his ashes in some of the places that he loved the best. And by next spring, we will also have spread some at the base of a little maple tree that we planted in our yard to honor him. I think that we will still keep some ashes with us, always, to move with us if we move, and to stay with us where we go. But it feels really comforting to walk through the woods and by the lake that he loved, and to know that his ashes have helped to nourish the land.

So that is one way in which Barkis still remains alive in my heart. But I loved what you said at the end of your post, Saskia -- to think about pausing for a moment and honoring ALL of the pets around the world... not just our own, but those everywhere. So on Sunday, especially, that is what I will do...

Marianne (forever Barkis' and Peg's mom)